Application for permission for dating my daughter

APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage, and current medical report from your doctor. ) _______________________________ ________________________________ Mother's Signature Father's Signature _______________________________ ________________________________ Pastor/Priest/Rabbi State Representative/Congressman Thank you for your interest, and it had better be genuine and non-sexual. You will be contacted in writing if you are approved.NAME_____________________________________ DATE OF BIRTH_____________ HEIGHT___________ WEIGHT____________ IQ__________ GPA_____________ SOCIAL SECURITY #_________________ DRIVERS LICENSE #________________ BOY SCOUT RANK AND BADGES____________________________________________ HOME ADDRESS_______________________ CITY/STATE___________ ZIP______ Do you have parents? ___Yes ___No If No, explain: ______________________________________________________________ Number of years they have been married ______________________________ If less than your age, explain ______________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________ ACCESSORIES SECTION: A. Please do not try to call or write (since you probably can't, and it would cause you injury).Any attempt to make contact might cause you injury.If your application is rejected, two gentlemen with violin cases and "one-size-fits-all" cement shoes will notify you.When would it the best time to interview your father, mother, relatives, neighbors, minister/rabbi/priest, and past girlfriends? You will be contacted in writing if you are approved.(supply phone numbers) __________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________________________ Thank you for your interest in my daughter. Do not try to call or write (since you probably can’t, anyway).It appeared in his wifes column in the Nonpareil Newspaper called Kippies Corner." (abt. NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, history, lineage, recent FBI background check, psychiatric evaluation, and updated medical report from your doctor.

In 50 words or less, what does "Don't touch my daughter mean to you?

Your applications will be processed and returned to you in around four weeks.

Thank you for your interest Please allow four to six years for processing. Please do not try to call or write (since you probably can't and it would cause you injury.) if your application is rejected you will be notified by two gentlemen wearing white ties and carrying violin cases.

In 50 words or less, give your definition of "Real Pain." Church you attend_____________________ How often do you attend?

S, M, W, T, F, S When would be a good time to interview your mother, father and minister?

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